Four Year Ago

Four years ago today, I experienced a Myocardial Infarction that required an emergency cardiac interventional procedure. Michael and I were married just 2 months and 9 days.

I was really frightened-facing your own mortality can be a life changing experience. I made the decision to live life on my own terms, to embrace my fears and step outside of my comfort zone. I began doing the things I had always talked about, instead of waiting for a better time.

What I didn't anticipate was the impact it would have on my husband. He did not respond well to my heart attack. Instead, he acted out of fear based on his belief that he was going to lose me. He distanced himself as a way of preparing for the fact that I might die and leave him.

Perhaps it was because I had shared my experiences of watching a husband die, of building a life as a widow, that he reacted that way. All I know is that it almost ended our marriage.

With the help of a wonderful therapist, we were able to work thru the issues that sent us down the road to divorce. Our dedication to making it work combined with the assistance with a professional enabled us to create a bond that has cemented the foundation of our union.

Whenever we encounter a situation that creates difficulty in our lives, we need to keep in mind the impact it has on those who love us as well. And we should be open to the possibility that we may need to seek the help of a professional to get us through.